Strike Out
The first year my son started playing baseball I sat on the edge of my seat for every practice and every game trying to pray him through those 2 hours. I was praying for a calmness in his spirit and success in his game.
He has a quick temper and will often react without thinking. This is challenging for him in life and in sports. Nothing puts a pit in my stomach more than seeing coaches, parents or players display poor sportsmanship, and I was living in fear that MY kid would be the one to throw a bat when he struck out or kick the fence when he missed a catch. I don't know if his lack of patience and quickness to anger interferes with his ability to play or if he is just one of those kids that doesn't have a natural knack for all the playground games. Either way, he's my less sporty kid.
What he might lack in athletic prowess he makes up for in mental aptitude for the game - any game. He understands strategy and technique and somehow knows all the rules and can explain them concisely. These skills made him a perfect candidate for keeping the official scorebook for Eli's teams throughout the years and to begin umpiring this year. It gave him a job that he could really get into and one that seems to come naturally to him. He watches videos, reads the rules, plays out scenarios and does his best to make the right calls and evaluate himself following a game.
Matt and the other kid joined our church softball team this year but the younger wasn't old enough. An opportunity came up for him to volunteer as an umpire and he jumped on it. It was a way for him to be part of the team in a capacity that he felt confident.
He umpired his first and last time a few weeks ago. I'll skip the boring details but in short, the church teams were pretty brutal to him. Every pitch, every call he made, was deemed incorrect by at least someone on one of the teams.
I watched in the stands and debated which avenue to take. I wanted to rescue him. I wanted to jump off the bleacher and say "hey - if you don't like his calls then find a different umpire". But the other part of me was impressed that he didn't waiver (expanding his strike zone) or argue with anyone. He was calm, he looked unshaken by the constant berating. I opted to stay out of it and just be there for him in support. When he finished the game, he walked off the field and said to me "this game tested me more than all of the games for little league combined". He officially hung up his umpire cap for the church league and plans to wait until little league resumes in the Spring before he umps again.
I was so incredibly proud of this kid for enduring. I would have walked off at the 3rd inning for sure.
I was embarrassed that the men of my church felt so competitive or so frustrated that they were willing to take it out on a young man trying to do his best.
If I could huddle up those teams and have a little chat with them I would say this:
"You only see with the eyes of a man who wants to get the hit, the strike-out, the catch, or the run. You are not seeing with the eyes of someone who sees beyond these 6 innings.
There is a battle going on right now for this kid's life. There is a battle for the way he spends his time, for the way that he finds happiness, and for what he needs to do in his life in order to feel success. There is a battle for his identity. Your six innings are a mere vapor compared to the battles that are going on daily. He was spending 4 hours at a ballfield watching his youth leaders and friends play a game - instead of the million other ways he could spend his time and that is now gone.
Satan won that battle of 4 hours on Sunday nights because you people can't see beyond the game."
These guys don't know my kid. They don't know how destructive their words were. So the lesson I take away from this is a reminder to myself to be kind. To assume that the person who is frustrating me, might have a battle going on and I get to choose to help them win that battle or to help them be defeated.
I don't want them to strike-out. I want them to get a home run. And if they can't, if they aren't there yet, if a homerun is too much to ask, then get on base and run your heart out to get to the next one, and then the next one. I want them to make it home and feel like they are victorious as an individual and as part of a team.
We may never know the role we play in a stranger's life - make the best of it.
He has a quick temper and will often react without thinking. This is challenging for him in life and in sports. Nothing puts a pit in my stomach more than seeing coaches, parents or players display poor sportsmanship, and I was living in fear that MY kid would be the one to throw a bat when he struck out or kick the fence when he missed a catch. I don't know if his lack of patience and quickness to anger interferes with his ability to play or if he is just one of those kids that doesn't have a natural knack for all the playground games. Either way, he's my less sporty kid.
What he might lack in athletic prowess he makes up for in mental aptitude for the game - any game. He understands strategy and technique and somehow knows all the rules and can explain them concisely. These skills made him a perfect candidate for keeping the official scorebook for Eli's teams throughout the years and to begin umpiring this year. It gave him a job that he could really get into and one that seems to come naturally to him. He watches videos, reads the rules, plays out scenarios and does his best to make the right calls and evaluate himself following a game.
Matt and the other kid joined our church softball team this year but the younger wasn't old enough. An opportunity came up for him to volunteer as an umpire and he jumped on it. It was a way for him to be part of the team in a capacity that he felt confident.
He umpired his first and last time a few weeks ago. I'll skip the boring details but in short, the church teams were pretty brutal to him. Every pitch, every call he made, was deemed incorrect by at least someone on one of the teams.
I watched in the stands and debated which avenue to take. I wanted to rescue him. I wanted to jump off the bleacher and say "hey - if you don't like his calls then find a different umpire". But the other part of me was impressed that he didn't waiver (expanding his strike zone) or argue with anyone. He was calm, he looked unshaken by the constant berating. I opted to stay out of it and just be there for him in support. When he finished the game, he walked off the field and said to me "this game tested me more than all of the games for little league combined". He officially hung up his umpire cap for the church league and plans to wait until little league resumes in the Spring before he umps again.
I was so incredibly proud of this kid for enduring. I would have walked off at the 3rd inning for sure.
I was embarrassed that the men of my church felt so competitive or so frustrated that they were willing to take it out on a young man trying to do his best.
If I could huddle up those teams and have a little chat with them I would say this:
"You only see with the eyes of a man who wants to get the hit, the strike-out, the catch, or the run. You are not seeing with the eyes of someone who sees beyond these 6 innings.
There is a battle going on right now for this kid's life. There is a battle for the way he spends his time, for the way that he finds happiness, and for what he needs to do in his life in order to feel success. There is a battle for his identity. Your six innings are a mere vapor compared to the battles that are going on daily. He was spending 4 hours at a ballfield watching his youth leaders and friends play a game - instead of the million other ways he could spend his time and that is now gone.
Satan won that battle of 4 hours on Sunday nights because you people can't see beyond the game."
These guys don't know my kid. They don't know how destructive their words were. So the lesson I take away from this is a reminder to myself to be kind. To assume that the person who is frustrating me, might have a battle going on and I get to choose to help them win that battle or to help them be defeated.
I don't want them to strike-out. I want them to get a home run. And if they can't, if they aren't there yet, if a homerun is too much to ask, then get on base and run your heart out to get to the next one, and then the next one. I want them to make it home and feel like they are victorious as an individual and as part of a team.
We may never know the role we play in a stranger's life - make the best of it.
Comments