Dogs like to pee on me and lick my face.
maybe not at the same time....but they quite enjoy both separately.
Dogs hate me.
We are dog sitting two poodles.
The owner came over with them a month or so ago to see how the dogs liked us and the house and kind of just introduce us to make the dog-sitting go better.
The dogs were amazing. They do all these great tricks. They dance, and shake, lay down, roll over, and ring a bell when they need to go poodle doo outside.
One jumped up on my lap and fell asleep while we were visiting. The dogs are all snuggly and non-shedding and clean.
We were looking forward to these amazing little fur-babies' visit.
And then they arrived.
The first night went ok. One of the dogs likes to clean her butt or suck her toes or something all night which was highly annoying. And then the other one started having nightmares or something and was growling/whining/snoring in her sleep.
We made it through the night and I was greeted by a nice little puddle of pee on the wood floor in the morning.
Though irritated, I have a standard grace period for doggy guests of 24 hours. They were probably a little uncomfortable with their new environment and I could not have understood her cues or perhaps she didn't know where she was suppose to go to ring her bell. I cleaned up the pee made a second cup of coffee to get me moving and went on about my day.
At 3:30pm Gabe found poop on the carpet.
Although Matt was home ALL day, he claimed it was my fault that she pooped on the carpet. Since I didn't tell him that she didn't go in the morning, he wasn't vigilant to watch for potty work and therefore he didn't encourage her to poop. Somehow that logic makes it my fault.
I would like to point out at there is a "wee-wee pad" right by the door. The owners said it was for emergency use in case we are gone a long time.
Ahem.
Floor wet.
Carpet pooped on.
Wee-wee pad dry.
Around 10pm I headed up to bed. It was windy and chilly last night so I was planning to watch a show on the iPad in bed instead of on the couch. I tossed the iPad onto the bed, got in my jams, and then came back and snuggled in.
But wait...
When I picked up my iPad to start my show it was wet.
And then I realized I was laying under a puddle of poodle pee.
A DOG PEED ON MY BED!
Since we were all home all night, and readily available to answer to the dogs ding-a-linging the pee-pee bell, I am completely convinced this pe-incident was not an accident. It was a calculated plan to strike out against me for some reason that I don't know.
Obviously, I freaked out.
I stripped the bed, assessed the damage, re-made the bed, yelled at the dogs and then cleaned the iPad.
Suddenly these well trained dogs lost their ability to even respond to their names.
Then I was furious. Where else has the dogs peed or pooped? Is there urine and feces lingering around my house just waiting for me to step in in?
I hopped out of bed and started Operation Find the Poodle Pee and Poodle Doo. I searched the house top to bottom looking for any unwanted poodle waste. I paid special attention to my Afghan rug that Matt bought me while he was deployed. If there was anything hanging around, I didn't see it, step in it or smell it.
I finally went to bed at midnight.
I woke up at 6 and around 6:30 came out of the room to take the dogs down to go potty. I noticed one of the dogs was already up, the other still sleeping soundly at the foot of the bed.
And then....I came down stairs and SURPRISE dog crap in the living room very, very close but not quite touching my Afghan rug.
That little brat had an "accident" in the 6.5 hours from midnight when we took them out last until 6:30am?
I think not.
The dogs are mocking me.
They hate me.
And they are torturing me.
I came home from work today and sat down next to Matt on the couch. The white one was farting up a storm. I thought that little beast might actually be crapping as she snored on the couch and then the black one hopped on my lap all loving and sweet. And proceeding to lick the flesh off my nose.
Dog licks butt.
Dog licks my nose.
Dog may as well rubbed her butt on my nose.
Dogs hate me.
Dogs hate me.
We are dog sitting two poodles.
The owner came over with them a month or so ago to see how the dogs liked us and the house and kind of just introduce us to make the dog-sitting go better.
The dogs were amazing. They do all these great tricks. They dance, and shake, lay down, roll over, and ring a bell when they need to go poodle doo outside.
One jumped up on my lap and fell asleep while we were visiting. The dogs are all snuggly and non-shedding and clean.
We were looking forward to these amazing little fur-babies' visit.
And then they arrived.
The first night went ok. One of the dogs likes to clean her butt or suck her toes or something all night which was highly annoying. And then the other one started having nightmares or something and was growling/whining/snoring in her sleep.
We made it through the night and I was greeted by a nice little puddle of pee on the wood floor in the morning.
Though irritated, I have a standard grace period for doggy guests of 24 hours. They were probably a little uncomfortable with their new environment and I could not have understood her cues or perhaps she didn't know where she was suppose to go to ring her bell. I cleaned up the pee made a second cup of coffee to get me moving and went on about my day.
At 3:30pm Gabe found poop on the carpet.
Although Matt was home ALL day, he claimed it was my fault that she pooped on the carpet. Since I didn't tell him that she didn't go in the morning, he wasn't vigilant to watch for potty work and therefore he didn't encourage her to poop. Somehow that logic makes it my fault.
I would like to point out at there is a "wee-wee pad" right by the door. The owners said it was for emergency use in case we are gone a long time.
Ahem.
Floor wet.
Carpet pooped on.
Wee-wee pad dry.
Around 10pm I headed up to bed. It was windy and chilly last night so I was planning to watch a show on the iPad in bed instead of on the couch. I tossed the iPad onto the bed, got in my jams, and then came back and snuggled in.
But wait...
When I picked up my iPad to start my show it was wet.
And then I realized I was laying under a puddle of poodle pee.
A DOG PEED ON MY BED!
Since we were all home all night, and readily available to answer to the dogs ding-a-linging the pee-pee bell, I am completely convinced this pe-incident was not an accident. It was a calculated plan to strike out against me for some reason that I don't know.
Obviously, I freaked out.
I stripped the bed, assessed the damage, re-made the bed, yelled at the dogs and then cleaned the iPad.
Suddenly these well trained dogs lost their ability to even respond to their names.
Then I was furious. Where else has the dogs peed or pooped? Is there urine and feces lingering around my house just waiting for me to step in in?
I hopped out of bed and started Operation Find the Poodle Pee and Poodle Doo. I searched the house top to bottom looking for any unwanted poodle waste. I paid special attention to my Afghan rug that Matt bought me while he was deployed. If there was anything hanging around, I didn't see it, step in it or smell it.
I finally went to bed at midnight.
I woke up at 6 and around 6:30 came out of the room to take the dogs down to go potty. I noticed one of the dogs was already up, the other still sleeping soundly at the foot of the bed.
And then....I came down stairs and SURPRISE dog crap in the living room very, very close but not quite touching my Afghan rug.
That little brat had an "accident" in the 6.5 hours from midnight when we took them out last until 6:30am?
I think not.
The dogs are mocking me.
They hate me.
And they are torturing me.
I came home from work today and sat down next to Matt on the couch. The white one was farting up a storm. I thought that little beast might actually be crapping as she snored on the couch and then the black one hopped on my lap all loving and sweet. And proceeding to lick the flesh off my nose.
Dog licks butt.
Dog licks my nose.
Dog may as well rubbed her butt on my nose.
Dogs hate me.
Comments