Not Martha AT ALL!!

The sun is shining which means spring might officially have arrived here in the Pacific Northwest!  Yay!
Time for Spring cleaning and some projects that I've been putting off.
I'll spare you the thought process and skip to the very disastrous DIY project.
Shortly after we moved in I painted Gabe's bed a lovely shade of blue.  Both of the boys' beds were oak, which is fine but since the walls are not painted and the beds are old and a bit outdated, I decided to spruce up the room by painting the beds.
I never got to Eli's bed because it got chilly and paint drying seemed to take forever.
Until yesterday when the sun shone.
I did everything out of order and rushed, and of coarse disaster struck.
I opened the primer can in the garage, then brought it, the drop cloth and the brushes upstairs to Eli's room.
Any ideas where this is going?
I didn't want to set the paint can on the ground until I got the drop cloth down, for fear of spilling any paint on the carpet, so I put the paint can on the edge of the bed.
You know what is next right?  Sure you do.  Why didn't I see this coming yesterday?
I put the drop cloth down, bump the bed, the paint can goes FLYING off the bed and onto the floor.
Paint splatters on the curtains, the wall and about a half gallon pours into the carpet.
Panic totally set in.
I scream at the boys for help.
Towels, hurry towels!!!  Big garbage bags!!
I didn't bother with complete sentences, I just shouted out orders left and right.
Then I remembered I have a Green Machine carpet cleaner in the garage that is broken.  I holler at the boys to bring it up.  Within minutes I scooped up massive amounts of paint, took down the curtains and had Gabe scrubbing them in the bathtub and I was sucking up paint with the carpet cleaner.
I sent Eli down to research "help I dumped a gallon of paint on the carpet of my new house" on the internet and he dutifully reported back three ways to accomplish the task.

"Mess" doesn't begin to describe what was going on in that room.
After about an hour, I gave up the cleaning effort, primed the bed, and then set out to clean up the secondary mess.
I'm sad to say that the carpet cleaner didn't survive.  It is filled with paint, clogged up and it started leaking.  Yikes.
I managed to keep the paint spill in a contained area, tossed bags of painted mess, cleaned up from the actual painting and closed the door for the night.
The curtain still needs some attention, the carpet looks amazing, considering what was dumped on it, and after two showers and using every home remedy known to man, I finally got 90% of the paint off of my body.

The bed is primed, poorly, but hopefully it is good enough!
I have no idea when I'll venture to actually paint the bed.  I'm so scared.
And I'm setting out today to do some more carpet cleaning.

Some people say "D-I-Y" like pronounce the letters and make it sound all cool and fancy.  I said DIE.  As in I will likely immediately regret starting the project 3 minutes into it.

Some people are changers.  They scoop up the messy and make things all new and shiny.  I'm more of a hirer.  I need to hire a changer to make my messy things new and shiny.  Otherwise, I'm in the dog-house for making disastrous messes.

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