In the past two weeks at two different churches in two different states I have heard two different pastors say this exact phrase "show me your friends and I'll show you your future".
Both times that particular part of the message was speaking to youth about their choices and challenging parents to stay involved and make a stand as to who their children would be allowed to hang out with.
I did a quick evaluation of Eli's friends. Based on his current friends, his future will be filled with baseball, Minecraft, and card games.
The friends' favorite pastimes are acceptable, they come from involved families that don't put up with crazy behaviors, the kids are respectful, and really just plain old "good kids". So far, good choices.
There are two things that are missing in his friends: smarty pants and church friends.
Eli is a smart kid however his friends are not, at least in the academic realm. This is a problem. I notice that Eli doesn't want to participate in any of the extra activities at school that are for "smart kids" because he doesn't have any smart kid friends. He also seems to resist the possibility of being labeled a smart kid or over achiever, although he has never spoken negatively about these kids.
While Eli loves going to church and really has a great time there, enjoys his leaders and hanging out with other kids his age at church, he doesn't have any friendships there that extend beyond the walls of the church.
I want his future to contain both of these elements, working to his greatest potential academically and involvement in a church community, so if it is true that his friends predict his future, the absence of these two types of friends is slightly concerning for me.
However, what if a kid doesn't make friends easily? What if they have no friends? What does that say about their future?
Eli seems very outgoing but he is quite shy when it comes to making new friends. He enjoys the surface relationships but he doesn't often push further to make a new friend to hang out with.
And that brings me to Gabe. He has no friends. He has kids he hangs out with at school but he has rarely invited anyone over to hang out with him outside of school. He doesn't attend a kids' service at church so he knows absolutley nobody there.
I don't think Gabe is particularly unhappy about his friend situation. He is definitely frustrated with the fact that he doesn't have any neighborhood friends, but the reality is the kids in the neighborhood would play with him if he chose to play.
I feel good about the friends that the kids choose, when they choose them. So I guess the challenge for me is to facilitate and encourage the kids to build more relationships that will help carry them through tough times.
Just over two weeks before school starts...time to buckle down on some prayers for good friends!
Both times that particular part of the message was speaking to youth about their choices and challenging parents to stay involved and make a stand as to who their children would be allowed to hang out with.
I did a quick evaluation of Eli's friends. Based on his current friends, his future will be filled with baseball, Minecraft, and card games.
The friends' favorite pastimes are acceptable, they come from involved families that don't put up with crazy behaviors, the kids are respectful, and really just plain old "good kids". So far, good choices.
There are two things that are missing in his friends: smarty pants and church friends.
Eli is a smart kid however his friends are not, at least in the academic realm. This is a problem. I notice that Eli doesn't want to participate in any of the extra activities at school that are for "smart kids" because he doesn't have any smart kid friends. He also seems to resist the possibility of being labeled a smart kid or over achiever, although he has never spoken negatively about these kids.
While Eli loves going to church and really has a great time there, enjoys his leaders and hanging out with other kids his age at church, he doesn't have any friendships there that extend beyond the walls of the church.
I want his future to contain both of these elements, working to his greatest potential academically and involvement in a church community, so if it is true that his friends predict his future, the absence of these two types of friends is slightly concerning for me.
However, what if a kid doesn't make friends easily? What if they have no friends? What does that say about their future?
Eli seems very outgoing but he is quite shy when it comes to making new friends. He enjoys the surface relationships but he doesn't often push further to make a new friend to hang out with.
And that brings me to Gabe. He has no friends. He has kids he hangs out with at school but he has rarely invited anyone over to hang out with him outside of school. He doesn't attend a kids' service at church so he knows absolutley nobody there.
I don't think Gabe is particularly unhappy about his friend situation. He is definitely frustrated with the fact that he doesn't have any neighborhood friends, but the reality is the kids in the neighborhood would play with him if he chose to play.
I feel good about the friends that the kids choose, when they choose them. So I guess the challenge for me is to facilitate and encourage the kids to build more relationships that will help carry them through tough times.
Just over two weeks before school starts...time to buckle down on some prayers for good friends!
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