Even in the midst of celebration you're gonna have a bad day.
I went to bed super grumpy last night.
Two reasons: Matt doesn't want new jeans and I'm a little crazy.
Matt has 5 pair of jeans.  This is weird for me to start off with because I have about 15 (cut me some slack I have bootcut, skinny, black, blue, dark blue).  2 of those pairs of jeans are acid wash.  Not the new trendy acid wash, I'm talking straight out of 1989 acid wash.  Two others are really nice and happen to be brand new - his mom bought them for him in Feb because she too was irritated by the acid wash, tattered jeans he was sporting. The other pair is fine, not great, but not acid wash.  So until the jeans purchase with his mom, the man looked the fool in jeans.
Matt comes home from deployment and he doesn't have quite the same physique he did before....by a lot.  Picture a hobo holding up pants that are 2 sizes too big with a dog leash.  So ridiculous. So when he was at the mall the other day, I told him to buy 2 pair of jeans.  He didn't feel like it, so he came home with a leather case for his cell phone.  Seriously?  Leather case for his phone.  His phone is dressed better than he is.
After seeing that his pants were literally pegged at the waist, I decided to take things into my own hands and took him shopping last night.  We get to the mall and he declares he doesn't want jeans.  Ok, we came to the mall for the sole purpose of buying jeans and now he tells me he doesn't want them?  I coerce him toward a store that carries the exact jeans he is wearing (a style we know he likes) and upon arrival at the store, and selecting the exact jeans he is wearing but a size smaller he scoffs at the price tag and declares he will not pay $60 for a pair of jeans.  I almost....almost blurted out "$60?  I've totally paid more for jeans" then decided that wasn't information I really needed to reveal.  So off we go to a store that will have cheeper jeans, however a store that he doesn't own a a pair of jeans from so he is going to need to try something on.  And he refuses.  Then when I gave him the glare that would make Superman cry. He succombed to my shopping superpowers and went into the fitting room with 2 different styles.  He came out, spun, went back in, put the jeans back and said "I'm not buying jeans".
And in my head I think I said "and I'm not going to be happy with you until you do".
The kids were at church, we skipped out to have a "date night" jeans shopping.  His reward for jeans shopping was going to be a cold one at the pub inside the mall.  He got a cold one...a cold beer and a cold shoulder because I was pissed.
Needless to say, I went to bed angry.

I have this amazing ability to spin something really quite simple into something super complex or something innocent into a personal attack, while sleeping.
Aside from the jeans thing, I was slightly irritated over something ridiculously small last night when I went to bed.  Like really, ridiculously minute in the grand scheme of life, but by the time I woke up this morning I had turned that mole hill into a mountain!  I'm not talking about exaggerating an issue, I'm talking about making up an entirely new one.
For example: lets say I'm the last one to get an invitation to some event and a little hurt about it.  I have the power to create a story in my head that there was a big event and I wasn't invited at all.  Then I take it to another level and have a dreamed up confrontation fight and then I rally people on my side and I storm off angry and hurt and everyone feels bad for me.... all while sleeping.  A big fat dose of crazy.  I admit it.

So with the pants and the made-up problem stemming from a real life pothole.....I woke up grumpy.
Not good. Never good.

Gabe woke up late, his pants were too tight (seriously with the pants issue again?) and he hadn't cleaned out his lunch box from the day before so everything needed to be dumped, packed and he was already running late.  So he got grumpy real fast.
There were raised voices.
Mine.
Gabe stormed out of the house to wait for the bus and a few moments later I heard the door open and close.  I called out his name and there was no answer.  I peeked out the door and I found my sweet Eli, standing outside with Gabe, waiting with him for his short bus.
I told Eli is was nice of him to wait with Gabe and I asked why he did it.  His response..."because it seemed like he was having a bad day, so I thought I should wait with him".
My heart....so full.

Moments later I get an email from Gabe's teacher explaining he was having problems with his peers in class.  My heart sank.  I know this kid has some social issues....it is so hard to parent that.  I can teach him how to be friendly, kind, open, and fun....but I can't make him be any of those things.

The drive to work was tear filled as I pondered Gabe's struggle with friendship and cooperation, and then I arrived at school and got waived down by a super sweet little student who, in the most adorable way possible, told me that Raymond puked.  Yay.

I'm mad at my husband, I'm irritated with the other semi-fake situation, Gabe is struggling, the lady on the radio is dating a married man and thinks its ok, and now Raymond pukes.

There are going to be bad days.....even during a time when everything is supposed to be grand.  The reality is, there are going to be bad days.

Matt and I worked through the pants issue. He understands my pants perspective and is now the proud new owner of two well fitted pairs of dungarees, Gabe had a good meeting with his teacher and we are looking toward some steps to making his social aspect of school become more successful and Raymond went home after puking his way from the ball shed to the front office.  As for the lady that thinks dating married men is ok, well I'll just keep praying for her twisted soul.

Tomorrow is a new day.  I truly hope everyone has well fitting pants and I don't make up some drama while sleeping.


Comments

Popular Posts