Let me out!!!

Right now it is 11am on Wednesday in Seoul, South Korea.  Why do I care what time it is in Seoul?  Because that is where I was planning to be.  I was going to visit my friend and follow her around to all the great corner-in-the-wall foodie places and seeing sights that are far older than anything I could possibly view here in Washington.

My flight left 90 minutes late on Friday, I tracked it. It was probably an incredibly empty flight.  There is a good chance I would have an entire row to myself.  Upon landing, I would have had to promise to do health checks twice a day and be tracked by the South Korean health team. While I would have still been able to visit my friend, we wouldn't have been allowed to eat at any of those great restaurants or go sightseeing.

I feel confident that I made the right call to stay home.  But the right call doesn't mean it feels good.

When it became clear that the Korea trip wasn't going to happen for me, I booked a flight to Colorado to see another friend.  A few days after I booked it, I also canceled that flight, adhering to the government's request that non-essential travel is delayed or canceled.

The travel plans were just the first big events that shook me.  Adding to the list were a few concerts we have tickets for, a play I really, really wanted to see, Sounders matches are canceled, and it is becoming quite clear that Eli will not have a graduation ceremony either.

I'm constantly torn between doing what is natural and only doing what is essential.  Is taking a trip to see my cousins, going to the grocery store, taking a hike, getting flowers from the guy on the corner essential?  Is getting take-out essential?  

What if I'm losing my ever-lovin mind - then will leaving town be essential??

I feel committed to the May 4th "stay at home - stay safe" order, but the thought of this policy extending through summer is making me a little crazy.  I just can't wrap my head around it.  Let me out!!  I'm feeling like my definition of "essential" is going to change real soon.