Driver's Ed
Eli is taking a driving course.
I know, it is completely shocking to me too.
How can he be old enough?
It was just days ago that he was sitting naked on a toddler toilet with the "potty" cars that aunty bought him to encourage him to poo, flying them through the air making car noises. And now he is learning to drive real live cars?
Eli attends class three days a week for two hours and then has an hour a week of driving with an instructor. In addition to all that, he has homework. So far, the homework has consisted of him sitting in a parked vehicle pointing out what all the buttons and instruments are. Soon the homework will include more challenging things, like driving with us. Gasp!
I read his homework for this week. Most things seemed reasonable until I came to the instruction for him to change the tire on one of our vehicles.
Me: you have to change a tire?
Eli: yes
Me: for real or just pretend?
Eli: for real, on one of our cars
Me: why? We have roadside assistance.
Eli: so I know how to do it.
Me: thats absurd. I'm 40 years old and have never changed a tire.
Eli: I don't know, we just need to learn how to do it.
Me: well you pull off the road, pick up a phone and call USAA. There, lesson over.
Eli: moooooom
Me: can we lie?
Why would I want to take a perfectly good tire off my car and replace it with a donut? This seems dangerous, actually more like reckless. I think the school should have a model car that students can take the tires off an such.
What's next? Change my oil? Replace the brakes?
Eli doesn't remember to close the lid on the toilet, put the lid on his toothpaste or take his belt and wallet out of his pants before he puts them in the laundry. I really don't think anyone wants their car serviced by this kid.
Maybe we can take him to a junk yard?
I know, it is completely shocking to me too.
How can he be old enough?
It was just days ago that he was sitting naked on a toddler toilet with the "potty" cars that aunty bought him to encourage him to poo, flying them through the air making car noises. And now he is learning to drive real live cars?
Eli attends class three days a week for two hours and then has an hour a week of driving with an instructor. In addition to all that, he has homework. So far, the homework has consisted of him sitting in a parked vehicle pointing out what all the buttons and instruments are. Soon the homework will include more challenging things, like driving with us. Gasp!
I read his homework for this week. Most things seemed reasonable until I came to the instruction for him to change the tire on one of our vehicles.
Me: you have to change a tire?
Eli: yes
Me: for real or just pretend?
Eli: for real, on one of our cars
Me: why? We have roadside assistance.
Eli: so I know how to do it.
Me: thats absurd. I'm 40 years old and have never changed a tire.
Eli: I don't know, we just need to learn how to do it.
Me: well you pull off the road, pick up a phone and call USAA. There, lesson over.
Eli: moooooom
Me: can we lie?
Why would I want to take a perfectly good tire off my car and replace it with a donut? This seems dangerous, actually more like reckless. I think the school should have a model car that students can take the tires off an such.
What's next? Change my oil? Replace the brakes?
Eli doesn't remember to close the lid on the toilet, put the lid on his toothpaste or take his belt and wallet out of his pants before he puts them in the laundry. I really don't think anyone wants their car serviced by this kid.
Maybe we can take him to a junk yard?
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