The People

We left Virginia just over 8 months ago. Not a day goes by without me thinking about our friends there. While I try to remain in the present and not focus too much on what I left behind, I can't help but mourn the loss of the circle of friends I had there. Sure, we are still friends, but are lives are no longer intertwined. Our conversations now include things like "did I tell you I got a job?" or "it is a whole long story, but the short version is....". I used to know everything going on in their lives as it was happening, not in retrospect. It is hard to no longer be a part of their lives and hard to find new friends to try and fill in the emptiness that is left.

So, when the opportunity came up to go back to Virginia for a week or so I knew I had to take it. I had to take it because I wanted to spend time with my friends, the boys needed to see theirs, and I felt like I needed to show them that I'm gone but I'm still invested in the relationships. Good friends can get together after years of being a part and the time that they missed in between will just vanish. This is what the trip was about.

Super Swanies: I think this is the name of Ryan's fantasy football team. Not sure, but it sticks in my head and therefore I call the bundle of them the Super Swanies. They opened their home to the boys and I and totally let us disrupt their lives. We had meals together, the kids played together, S.S. Ryan watched my boys TWICE so that S.S. Rachael and I could go be girly. I cried, I laughed, and I had a great time. Rachael set up play dates for the kids and accompanied me on most of my expeditions to eat at all our favorite restaurants while we were in town. I gained at least 8 pounds. A few days before we left I noticed Eli climbing all over Ryan. I was reminded that Ryan and Rachael are not just our friends, but important people to our kids as well. The boys love the Super Swanies and they missed them too.

The Matti: We got in town just in time to show up at one of the little Matti's 5th birthday party. Almost all the members of our small group were there. It was like a little reunion. Why didn't we get a picture? Later in the week we spent a night with them, a slumber party, but Casey may prefer that we not call it that. We chatted, had coffee and desert (something we used to do every Monday night for 2 years) and the kids played and laughed and made new memories. The first day we were spending time with the Matti, Casey and Samantha both commented how it seemed so natural that we were sitting in their living room and yet still so unbelievable. It was true. We walked in as if we were just stopping by and yet treasured every moment we were there as it was an invaluable jewel.

Church: We all went to church together on Sunday. We sat together in church and then in the coffee shop until we were practically kicked out. But they don't actually kick you out of church, they just suggest that the playground would be a good place for the kids to burn some energy. Though I saw most people in passing, there were hugs all around and it was nice to just be in a place where you are known and considered a part of the family.

Dinner and Playdates: We had meals with the Dentons, AunTina and Zuleika and Gabe (the original) and had meals and play dates with the Gastons and the Phillips.

I love our Phillips-Hernandez story. We met CJ and Laura in flight school - a long time ago - and we have never been stationed at the same place since. However, Laura and I have seen each other here and there over the past 9 years when either of us were passing through where the other was currently stationed. Our visits are usually short and we don't even try to "catch up" but enjoy being together and chatting about whatever. Last Spring our two families got together for a weekend down in Virginia Beach and Busch Gardens. Our kids had so much fun playing together and we had a great time with CJ and Laura. Time and distance vanish when we are together and I always leave thinking to myself "man, I really wish we could get stationed at the same place as them". Their oldest daughter is currently convinced she is marrying Eli, so we may be joined together for all of eternity. Only time will tell. Long distance relationships can be very hard on 6 and 7 year olds.

And finally Mary. Eli met his first best friend on the first day of Kindergarten. I will never forget, I asked him what he did at school and he told me he played with Mary. From that day forward he played with Mary. She was truly his very best friend and remains the only person he ever mentions from his school in Virginia. We set up a play date for Mary and Eli and Gabe and her younger brother Adam. Mary's mom and dad planned the perfect day. The kids made their own pizza and then made their own Sundaes. They danced, they played Wii, they laughed and they played. They never talk, they just play and that was OK with both of them.